Language is a powerful tool. It can also be wielded as a weapon to keep you in line and under the abusive person's "spell". Expressing contempt while still professing love is a sign of danger and a definite sign of an emotionally abusive partner.If you start to internalize your partner's negative claims about you, you may start telling yourself that you're not good enough.Recognize that your partner is using mind games to try and get you to put yourself down and feel worthless.
People use use children as weapons to hurt others are emotionally immature. The only valid and legitimate reason for any kind of alienation is if the person is being abusive to the child or the childs life is being endangered. Any sort of anger or disagreement between adults NEVER excuses child alienation, whether it be with the other parent, grandparents or other relatives. Keeping a child from those who love the child is a huge disservice to the child.