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IF GUNS don't kill people, people kill people does that mean that toasters don't toast toast, toast toast toast?

A State Trooper stopped a 95 year old woman on Interstate 75, and noticed as he was checking her drivers license, that she had a concealed carry permit. He said got any guns with you ma'am? She said yes, a 45 Smith & Wesson in the glove compartment, a 357 magnum in the console and a 38 special in my purse. The trooper said LADY what are you scared of. She said.... NOT A DAMN THING!

Sure, we Yanks don't know much about Queens or royals or jubilees or crisps, lorries, extra letter "U"s, or rhyme slang. But we do know . View Silly Pictures of the Queen" and more funny posts on CollegeHumor

@Mary Spurgeon.  Or at least remember the trouble I've gotten into.  ;-)

Memory and friendship. So true. I have the worst memory, but doesn't matter as long as my friends remember for me.

Funny Confession Ecard: My dream has always been to become a stay at home mom. Without kids.  ****That's what I'm talking about!!!***

Funny Confession Ecard: My dream has always been to become a stay at home mom. Without kids.*** DID THAT!

Someday, when you clean all the toilets, you can stay up late and eat the secret ice cream too.

late night secret stash of ice cream.haha - its even better when they clean all the toilets and yet I still get the secret ice cream!

✿✿¸.•*¨`*•..¸✿ ✿

If someone accuses you of having too much to drink, simply tell them. "That's impossible! You're still ugly!

Hahahaha.... Wonder what my mama woulda said if I woulda did this when I stayed at home... LOL

My mom said to me "guess whose doing the dishes tonight?I hit that Soulja Boy and said "YOUUUUUU!

I think i finally get this shit...... 'Adulthood' is mostly about being tired and wishing you hadn't made plans.

"I think I finally get this shit. 'adulthood' is mostly about being tired and wishing you hadn't made plans." hahaha 'bout sums it up!

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