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And I wouldn't get the best text messages EVER!!!

Alcohol because no great story started with someone eating a salad! Haha I want a sign like this

cupcakes

"You can't buy happiness but you can buy cupcakes, and that's kinda the same thing." Food should never REALLY equal happiness, but cupcakes are bliss. Home baked cupcakes are even better than bliss.

hahahahaha!!! @Alicia Yong

"We've been through a lot together and most of it was was your fault." - I can't stop laughing. This is what the dance instructor says to my husband about our dancing!

Useful note book

Things I say & why I need this.I will punch you in the face. I wanna punch them in the face. They need to be punched in the face. Im want to punch some people in the face.

Champagne is the liquid of champions.... In the mid morning lol

"Brunch without booze is just a sad late breakfast" = FACT. Bring on the Mimosas!

I mean Lolo loves you, Chris, but nothing beats unlimited Olive Garden breadsticks without gaining a pound or going into cardiac arrest.

So true . every guy thinks every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy . pshh, every girl's dream is to eat without getting fat.

Valentine's Day Funnies - The Spring Mount 6 Pack

Some Very Nontraditional Valentine's Day Cards

I love you like a back alley hooker loves crack. Guess what card my baby is getting for Valentine's?

Coffee keeps me going until it's acceptable to drink wine. Need. This. Shirt. Even better if it comes in tank top version

Coffee keeps me going until it's acceptable to drink wine. Jessica, I think this pretty much sums it up

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