But then I realized that I was holding on to something that didn't exist anymore, that the person I missed didn't exist anymore. People change, and we can wish they wouldn't all day long, but that never works.
This is true. Anxiety can take a good situation and turn it bad and a bad situation and turn it worse. I want to let go of my anxiety and live life happy and in the moment, not worrying about the future.
If you don't spend any time with your kids when they are young, don't be surprised when they don't want to spend any time with yoy when they are old enough to see what kind of parent (or person in general) you are.