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Quote, If you don't swear while driving then you're not paying attention to the road at all. How not to swear when some people are not paying attention.

Yep.

Quote T-shirt: I'm a lady with the vocabulary of a well educated sailor.

That about sums it up...

Free and Funny News Ecard: Why yes, Wal-Mart, I'd love to wait in line for 30 minutes behind a pajama-clad person who lacks deodorant and a bra. It's so nice of you to have 2 whole registers open.

My best friend and I need cameras to follow us to videotape our awesome lives!

Free and Funny News Ecard: When I do something hilarious, which let's face it is all the time, I think to myself, why do I not have my own television show.

It's embarrassing how much satisfaction I get out of this happening

Funny Friendship Ecard: I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

"Kiss my ass! You cheated on me in my dream last night and I'm not over it!"    This sounds like my husband, not me.

My husband said I woke up and slapped him one night and the next morning I told him I had a dream he cheated on me.

i can't be your friend if you can't handle my weirdness, sarcasm, stupid jokes, & my tendency to laugh at almost everything.

Funny Friendship Ecard: I can't be your friend if you can't handle my weirdness, sarcasm, stupid jokes, and my tendency to laugh at almost everything.

-FRL-14

FFA has been a par of my family life ever since i have known it is all that they know how to do

Just when I think that my daughter inherited nothing from me, she trips over her own feet and slams into a wall. Then I say to myself, 'Oh, there I am!'

Oh my I so hope mine and Leon's little girl will never inherit these genes. Then on second thought it will be super fun to see it happen to someone else for once in my life lol ;

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