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Funny but sad that it might work.

I changed my car horn sound to gun shots. - I changed my car horn sound to gun shots. People move out of the way much faster now.

Yep, no good deed goes unpunished.

My work has this cute thing they do where if you’re really good at your job…

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

Quote on office ecard: I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks. - Peg It Board

Lol

"I finally figured out my body type. Its hourglass with extra minutes." Love yourself for who you are!

Why is that?

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do.

A Great Cover Up For Windy Moments

Aunty Acid: If you ever root in public, just yell "turbo power" and walk faster.

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