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I'm smiling because you're my brother... I'm laughing because there is nothing you can do about it.

I have PMS, ADD & OCD. I want to kill you, but I can't focus on that right now, I have to go wash my hands. totally me!

Make sure your jeans always fit with Farrell's eXtreme Bodyshaping! #fitnesshumor

It's all fun & games till. your jeans don't fit anymore. The fun & games ended 2 days ago 😳!

Beauty wisdom from a friend of mine: Smiling gives you wrinkles. Resting Bitch Face keeps you pretty.

Smiling give you wrinkles resting bitch face keep you pretty. "Thank God I suffer from this.

So true!

Funny Farewell Ecard: Someday my headstone will read: 'If you're reading this, you're standing on my boobs.

damn ecards are always giving up my secrets

I love maxi skirts and dresses! "We may feel dressed up, but all women know that maxi skirts are just crotchless yoga pants.

And have babies whenever our husbands (guess they expect us to be heterosexual too) want us to

We've given up on having it all, and yet...

Yep, missed the memo. Especially about the washboard abs, sorry Micah ;

London Eye - I crossed this off my list in 2005 with one of my best friends in the world.

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: Bring on the warmer temperatures! Oh wait. I'm too fat for summer right now.

You either love Reese's peanut butter eggs or you're wrong. | Seasonal Ecard | someecards.com

There is no other option. Reester eggs and bunnies and trees are my favorite!

69fef4263f17f423e693244f97829271.jpg 420×294 pixels

Bananas are good. Always take a banana to a party. Good source of potassium.

Lol...

When I win the lottery, all my pin boards become reality. Everything will be delicious, covered in glitter, made out of pallets, and look effing amazing. If only.

You think I'm kidding but I'm not.

Pregnancy Message Boards - Baby Forums

You poor thing. You don't even realize you're batshit crazy,  do you?

Free, Workplace Ecard: You poor thing. You don't even realize you're batshit crazy, do you?

Yes

E-card: Too many people are walking around unmedicated, unsupervised and affecting my life

Amylicious: I totally forgot to eat!

I really laughed out loud on this one! This skinny girl just told me she "forgets" to eat? I just licked her face in case it's contagious ~ Joke All You Can

Funny Hamster Wheel Quote | Funny Joke Pictures

The wheel's turning but the hamster's dead!Yes and some times I know it has been dead for a long time!